Sunday, May 22, 2011


I have been asked to question more in my life lately and not just take everything someone says as truth. It's been quite interesting being more inquisitive. I am realizing that I never asked the meaty or even simple questions before because I felt that I should have the knowledge already. That I should research and find it out for myself, to not bother others with my questions. To just get down to the root of it, it was my pride that never allowed me to ask. And what fuels pride in that context, but fear. My fear of exposing myself in a way that I felt would come off weak, lazy, uneducated, left out, ignorant, etc. No one taught me to think so negatively about questions. I came to that conclusion myself. So, now, I am going to change that negative recording in my head for something more positive. The really cool thing that I am noticing is that it takes a lot more courage to ask questions and be open to others about the fact that you don't understand or know like they know, than I had anticipated. But another really awesome thing I have been able to witness is that when I ask a question out loud, the answer comes to me much faster than I realized it ever would/could. A lot of the times the answer comes before I can finish physically saying my question. It's like an instant download. It doesn't always happen this way, but it has surprised me how fast and how often this actually does happen. And instead of getting all analytical about it and doubt it happening that way, I have been able to embrace and accept that lovely gift that has been given to me. Quite an unexpected and wonderful outcome from asking questions.

I have always considered myself a person who worked hard and never turned down a challenge. So, it never occurred to me until recently that in just believing most everything anyone says that I have been taking the easy road. Patience is not my strong suit, so if there was a faster, less painful way to do anything, you better believe I was taking notes on how to do things in life THAT way. Being brought up in a religion that so easily maps out a way of life for you so you can maintain a certain outlook and happiness in life, my life has been predominantly one way. I wasn't the rebel type and in fact just the opposite. I was always trying to keep myself and everything else in order. It never made sense in my head to question the plan of happiness. It's pretty much self explanatory. A PLAN to be and maintain HAPPINESS. What I am questioning and seeing now for the first time in my 30 years of being alive is A (1) plan of happiness, but is it the ONLY plan to have/maintain happiness?? And what other plans of happiness to do others know about that I don't? I know I was given one flavor of ice cream and loved it for so long but I am now noticing that there are other flavors? Are they just as good? Or not? What do those ice cream flavors have in theirs that I don't have in mine? Can I mix the flavors to make my own/new flavor? And the questions just keep coming to mind like an ocean wave.

So, I am enjoying my journey of asking questions. The knowledge I receive from it is a bonus as well! It's more fun and surprisingly very liberating than I had ever imagined. I love to observe, so it's another way for me to observe my life! And my life is less stressful not holding onto all of these questions in my head!:)

No comments:

Post a Comment